dear all:
i've reflected on 2 things.

one during sy rogers' message today,
he brought 10 names and their hebrew meanings
the 10 names are the first 10 names from adam onwards.
so the left is the names, and the right is the meaning in hebrew.

adam- man
seth- appointed
enosh-mortal
kenan (or cainan)- sorrow
mehalalel- the blessed god
jared- shall come down
enoch- teaching
methusalah- till death shall bring

i HAVE to stop here by bringing up this point:
WHO WOULD NAME THEIR SON METHUSALAH?
i mean, its like 'till death shall bring, dinner's ready!'
anyway, continue.

lamach- the despairing
noah- comfort and rest

and if you were to put out the meanings together,
it means:
Man appointed (to) mortal sorrow. The blessed God shall come down teaching. Till death shall bring the despairing, comfort and rest.
everyone, 1, 2, 3.. Awww =))
if this is really true, then i guess we should scour the bibles more often.
for god comforts us in more subtlest ways than this.

*~*~*

Unforgivable Sinner

Kinda love your sense of time
Cos the days no matter no more
Or the feelings that you hide
Gonna tear you up inside
You know she hopes you tried

Follows you around all day
And you wake up soaking wet
Cos between this world and eternity
There is a face you hope to see

You know where you sent her
You should know where you are
You're trying to ease off
But you know you won't get far
And now she's up there
Sings like an angel
But you can't hear those words
And now she'd up there
Sings like an angel
Unforgivable sinner

You've been walking around in tears
No answers are there to get
You won't ever be the same
Someone cries and you're to blame

Struggling with a fight inside
Sorrow you'll defeat
The picture you see
It won't dissapear
Not unpleasant dream
Or the voice you hear

[chorus]

Maybe one time lost
But now you're found
Stand right up before you hit the ground
Maybe one time lost
But now you're found
Stand right up before you hit the ground

By Lene Marlin.
This is one song i've always wished i could sing good.

Another thing ive come to terms with is:
it came to my attention the people around me singing.
in fact, i just came out from marshmallow owner's blog.
so while listening to his singing,
i thought of the many people.
amanda, xiuling, zhongru himself, clara...
i thought of great singers like christina aguilera (my better off counterpart)
but most of all i thought of my 2 favourite japanese singers currently.
FictionJunction YUUKA and Mika Nakashima.
you MUST listen to them, if you can tolerate j-music.

wondering to myself.
'what happened to the christina in secondary school?'
i mean, people don't worship my singing in fairfield -_-
but, in fmss... i was acknowledged for my singing.
here in jj... i was more acknowledged for my sub-standard dancing and throat-destroying rara-ing.
heck, i mean, im not even acknowledged as a rara-er anymore.

i feel like im pretty much jack of all trades, or jill, rather.
it sucks to be average in everything.

i admit. its part of my fault that i always fool around, like singing out-of-tune?
i guess i should return to singing proper.
i never really left it, but... just distanced it for awhile.
but now the crunch comes.
people are going to criticise (so usual of the people in jj)

plus, my neighbour's singing really improved a lot from primary school.
everyone in her school tells her she's a great singer.
and when i sing in jj,
people tell me to shut up.
i guess my singing really stink now.

it's really very disorganised thoughts thrown here.
but i need to let go of some things.

Words of the *~PaRaNoId QuEEn~*
fallen from my notes.