my weekend is gone just like that 0.o
i wonder if i'm going to waste my 3 months of holidays the same way too.
but no! i won't let that happen!!
so i will draw out a 'things to do' list =P
which i will reveal (partially) to all when finite maths is over =P

went to church, which i must admit, it is true that when there're 'new blood' in the cell group,
members themselves feel refreshed in their walk with God.
i admit, seeing the new friends worshipping God, and bringing their bibles for the first time,
i cannot describe the joy of sowing the seed.
thank you God, for the special Easter.

This is your Savior
Pure Love of Heaven
Sent to Die on Calvary, to bear the sins of all
Rejected, cursed to die, Love silently Endured
His blood poured out an offering
At the foot of the Cross

lyrics of the song you hear in the crucifixion scene.
apparently it's written by our church and you know what that means..
that you can't find the song anywhere else.
darn it darn it darn it! =P

i'm starting to really be closer to my cell group,
i think that's the biggest blessing God can give me in this semester.
the desire to draw close to fellowship always prevails =))
i'm still taking small steps to know everyone better,
but i'm glad that here, people love me and make the effort to get into my life.

which is why, my dear homies (as coined by sammy),
the more you make fun of this bff,
the more i'll try to get into her life.
i feel so irked when i see that she's all alone.
so much for love.

yes i know, she'll annoy the hell out of me
and i'll come to you guys once or twice saying that i regretted it,
but i don't want anyone to feel alone.
and i don't want anyone to feel as if he or she needs to try hard to catch up to the friends.
i want everyone to feel loved and accepted for who they are,
yes, by all means try to change the person for the better.
(no one is perfect)
but still love the person.
i made this resolve last night.
you know who i'm talking about, so don't act dumb =\

there are many things i often said that i'll give up.
give up japanese... give up waiting for love to come...
and many more things that i said this sem that i'll give up.
but no matter how i try, no matter how i showed that i've washed my hands off this,
i can't.

i admit, there is no way i can ever ignore these things,
even if they frustrate me, hurt me, betrayed me, bowl me over..
i just can't.
quote enxian in his blog 'i rather die of exhaustion at the end of the journey.'
you tell me, it's not worth it.
but i say 'i still want to do so, because i love these things.'
that's why i'm still here.
because it's not about the physical distance anymore.

someone just told me that he will rely on me for emotional support.
i'm flattered =3 and i thought back in the early 2008.
where are the times when people look to me for emotional support?
what happened to the times when i was the person people turn to for spiritual guidance and prayer?
have i backslided in this aspect?
i pray and i pray with all my might,
that God will give me the strength and wisdom
to support the people that He gives me in the future.
like what cindy said, it's too early to sit back and relax.

Words of the *~PaRaNoId QuEEn~*
my entry is very spiritual today?
but that's how it's like when i'm in j2, and i love it.